The New Life

Life and death are the problem
until progress changes truths.
As age becomes a distant bother,
time increased with friend and brother,
a chance to go ‘tween lust and lover,
it’s meaning that we lose.

As truths evolve for some,
rights are changed for all.
And new problems take their place;
from a right-to-laugh to fashion taste,
it really doesn’t matter, whatever the case.
It’s life made superficial.

Homes

A month away from these whirring computers
and the delight of my own bed
made me miss a home I never thought I had.
The wind and sand of that far off place
made me realise how singular, how unique,
my own sands were.
I met place after place that was like my own,
but ultimately I knew that none were home.
And now I am here, I am home;
I have a book at my hands
and a brother to my left
and family just down the street.
And while most of me is happy,
that one part remains…
The family I learned I had in another place,
another land,
makes me miss a second home
I never thought I had.

For the Sake of Music

It’s because there are times
when the world feels empty,
because there are times
when today feels like just another
in a long line of yesterdays,
because sometimes the screams
and yells and curses and hate
is just a cross too heavy to bear,
because sometimes I need hope.
Why do I listen? Because sometimes
hope is the only hope left.

The Robot Learned to Cry

He doesn’t fight or work
or live by the law; he lives
by the land, he survives.
Life is the only life he knows,
not breath for the sake of
promises. He doesn’t
give himself to take, and
he doesn’t take without need.

And he’s no saint.

He is just a life amidst lives,
and his induction into civilisation
kills him. He is not civilised,
he is no servant to you or me,
he is a man by his own ways.
He is not for us nor gods nor
systems; he is for himself and
we’ve killed him. We’ve killed him.

100 Reasons

1 I am here because my life is learning
2 I am here because boredom is staleness
3 I am here for new eyes
4 I am here for worn shoes
5 I am here to try a part that’s new

6 I am here for the drink and what comes with
7 I am here for the concrete jungles at night
8 I am here for new light
9 I am here to shine bright
10 I am here to brush off the needless rough

11 I am here because I want to be
12 I am here to spend some time with me
13 I am here for a shoulder
14 I am here for a hand
15 I am here, sometimes, for no glorious plans

16 And I am here, sometimes, because my mind has run wild
17 I am here to be launched into the open air
18 I am here so that the wax may melt
19 I am here to be caught
20 I am here to face fear

21 I am here to discover a deeper me
22 I am here to find out which path to take
23 I am here to let go
24 I am here to hold on
25 I am here because I must find of what I’m made

26 I am here to unapologetically witness beauty
27 I am here to unapologetically witness sense
28 I am here to feel
29 I am here to taste
30 I am here to unapologetically try my hand and mind

31 I am here to evolve into a better me
32 I am here to find out just where I have been
33 I am here to reflect
34 I am here to react
35 I am here to move forward in my own world

36 I am here to prove something to myself
37 and to those I love
38 and to those I don’t
39 And I am here to learn how to let go of naught
40 I am here to learn how to hold on to my alls

41 I am here, sometimes, selflessly
42 I am here to listen and learn and teach
43 I am here to offer my hand and mind
44 I am here to offer the waves of my tides
45 And I am here to simply love, sometimes

46 I am here because the cat dragged me in
47 I am here through no mind of my own
48 I am here because someone said yes
49 and someone said no
50 but no one said bless

51 I am here to learn to accept what is mine
52 I am here to learn that I am fine
53 I am here to learn that others are there
54 I am here to learn hearts
55 I am here to learn tears

56 I am here to open up my eyes
57 I am here to open my heart
58 and mind
59 and whatever’s left, to open too
60 I am here to accept a fearful truth

61 I am here to detox from my own lies
62 I am here to let go of the falsehoods I learned
63 I am here at the twist of my own arm
64 I am here to believe
65 I am here to return

66 I am here to smile at others
67 and me
68 and nothing
69 and all
70 and to find an old me

71 I am here to embrace the who-I-have-been
72 I am here for reasons I still don’t remember
73 I am here for reasons I still don’t believe
74 I am here to emerge
75 I am here to relearn

76 I am here to make change I want to see
77 I am here to restructure where I have been
78 I am here to mould
79 I am here to reform
80 I am here because I can frame what others can’t see

81 I am here to discover just why I am
82 I am here to discover just what I am
83 and who I am
84 and where I am
85 and to lose all sense of when I am

86 I am here to take charge of my life
87 I am here to repent with each added line
88 I am here to be the entire coin
89 and sometimes heads
90 and sometimes tails
91 and sometimes neither if such is right
92 I must must learn my passion while I am here
93 I must nurture desire
94 and fatigue fear
95 and deal with ghosts inside my bones

96 I am here to make mistakes
97 I am here to make new ways
98 I am here for you
99 I am here for me
100 Most of all, I am here to be.

If It Were Real

I wish Dr Who was real;
not only because it would mean
a fantastical world of hopes
and dreams, not only because
infinity would finally be
finite, and not only because
I would no longer feel
like the only outlier. I wish
it was real because despite
oceans and winds and people
between us, despite the only way
to see your eyes being through
a one-way window, despite
knowing that the only way
to hear your voice is
through memories, everything
would seem so much smaller.
If it were real, you would seem
so much closer. If it were real,
maybe I’d only miss you
half as much.

Garden of Roses

There’s a garden of roses
outside of my room
and the roses do grow
while new flowers bloom.
I keep planting more,
the flowerbed grows
with every new
and perfect rose.
But the problem is,
with perfection that is,
that roses will wilt
against every wish.
Into time’s arms
the roses will fall;
eventually, each of them,
one and all.
But such is the grandness
of precious life:
it’s filled with ups
and downs and strife.
It’s the way that it is,
the way that life goes
for every single
perfect rose.
So forever, I
will plant one more;
an eternal garden
at my door,
and maybe time
will grant just one
that never wilts,
or until I’m done
it will survive,
a perfect rose
in sync with my
own crooked nose.
I don’t need perfect,
just perfection
to echo me,
be my reflection.
I will wait
until it grows
amongst my flowers:
my perfect rose.